setting goals

True Story:

I sat down today with a pen and paper and wrote down a little phrase that is supposed to help me win Life. I had scribed "Short Term Goals:" as my pen arose from the paper. Just at that very point a *twing* erupted from beneath my belly button. With hunger interrupting my list of goals I went to the pantry for a fresh jar of Dry Roasted Peanuts. If you like salt soaked snacks, you know what a dry roasted peanut is. It is what happens to the peanut man on the Planters container after he runs an ultra-marathon and is covered in peanut-man sweat, then roasted. These nuts are a favorite snack of mine.

As I stared at my pending list of goals and my freshly opened jar of dry roasted peanuts, a question arose regarding my existence. Could I consume an entire 16 ounce jar of dry roasted peanuts right at this very moment? Seems like a good goal, and since I only had about an hour, it would have to be short-term. I decided to write "eat entire jar of peanuts" on the list just for a laugh, then started eating the nuts by the handful.

It was a hot day, and I wanted to take this goal, like most life-goals, very seriously. I filled a large glass with tap water to make sure the salt would dilute and I wouldn't get too dehydrated or whatever. I also realized, quickly that this goal was attainable. A few handfuls in, and the nuts were already below the label. It had only been a couple of minutes, so I sipped some water and took a deep breath of summer air. Within that warm summer air was the smell of success. I could see why people write whole books about achieving your goals... It feels great, even if you haven't finished the task... achievement, it's like being repotted in a bigger pot because you have grown and your roots no longer fit in the small terra-cotta container, they need a bigger one to spread out and conquer.

At the 15 minute mark the jar of nuts was half gone. No problemo. I picked up my pen again to think of more goals I could crush, but before jotting anything down- the phone rang. It was a friend who had been without power calling me to tell me about how the power was back on. We chatted for a bit as I popped a couple nuts here and there. Upon completion of the call, I realized something- I had procrastinated!

My peanut goal had lost 15 minutes without really consuming much more than a dozen or so nuts. I thought about why I even wanted to do this and if it was worth it. Calories and salt intake are all issues people I know think a lot about. I was on the verge of consuming 3000 calories and somewhere around a billion milligrams of sodium. What sort of effect would that have on a 28 year old person? It was no big deal to NOT eat the nuts. Nobody saw me make the Short Term Goals List, and not a soul would know if I just crumpled it up and threw it in the bin, BUT, for some reason, I felt compelled to motor on. I did not want to look in the mirror and see a failure, and since there are a good 6 or 7 mirrors in my house, it would be unavoidable.

I sat back down and raced through the next quarter jar of nuts. I was well on my way when I felt as though the nuts were taking effect on my stomach. My body was thinking there was enough salt in my stomach, and wanted to let me know. It was an odd feeling of nausea mixed with failure. No no no! I thought. Continuing through the jar, I saw completion of my first goal take shape.

The jar was polished off in about 40 minutes. I didn't eat the salt at the bottom because I don't really consider that part of it- Part of putting one's mind to a goal and achieving it, which felt nice.

I lifted the pen and crossed "eat entire jar of peanuts" from the top of my goals list.